Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

Here's what happens when quark-gluon plasma 'splashes' during the most energetic particle collisions - Phys.org

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Be who you already are.

You are like me, then.

Why does my 5-year-old daughter keep repeating the words 'they will come for us, they will find us and touch us'? I'm quite scared.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

Tether overtakes Tron, DEXs with $432M in revenue – How and what next? - AMBCrypto

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

What do teens do at night?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

I had run out of hope.

I was tired of trying and failing.

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I was tired of fighting.

And the sadness?

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

What toxic behavior has been normalized by society?

It’s still here.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

Orton advances in the King of the Ring after the Paul Heyman Guys screw LA Knight - Cageside Seats

It’s here now, writing to you.

The sadness was still there.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Jets from black holes J1405+0415 and J1610+1811 - BBC Sky at Night Magazine

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Are there any types of headphones or earbuds that are specifically designed for wearing overnight?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.